Friday, November 13, 2009

Happy Second Birthday Sean

My itty bitty Sean in a bright blue blanket
Alika and Sean on the big slide at Kangaroo Zoo today
The very first time I held Sean he was about 12 hours old. I went into Jenny’s hospital room to do a nurse check. Jenny was sitting on the bed with Sean lying on the blanket between her legs. I asked if I could hold him. I don’t know why I remember holding him because I have held 100’s of babies on the postpartum unit. I asked his name and how her delivery was. I remember looking at him and saying all the usual things, “he’s really cute…” I distinctly recall feeling nothing special. I don’t even recall thinking he was particularly cute. I just remember looking at Jenny and thinking, this woman is not bonding with this baby.

I remember when I did bond with Sean. It was the second time we had him. He was about two weeks old. A couple of days after the domestic violence ER event Jenny called and asked if I would keep Sean for awhile so she and Ryan could talk about “what happened.” I went to their apartment and picked Sean up; he was so tense his little body was stiff. I brought him home and gave him a bath. After the bath I laid on the bed with him, got under the covers and put his naked little body against my chest, he melted into me and I fell in love. When AJ was born he was in the NICU for four days. I was staying at the hospital in a room for moms with hospitalized babies. On his third morning the NICU nurse came in and handed me AJ. I hadn’t been able to hold him yet. I unwrapped him, put him against my chest and he melted into me. The feeling with Sean was exactly the same. I think that night was the first time I asked Don, “Can we keep him?” His answer stayed the same for 22 months, “it’s not up to me.”

I’ve been the nurse to a ton of adopted babies and I've seen the excitement of the adoptive parents but always wondered if they could love an adopted baby as much as a biological baby. I now know for a fact the answer is yes.

Happy Birthday you little loved biscuit. We are glad you are in our family. We sure were'nt expecting you but we're glad you came.
I think this birthday nap picture is cute. If Woody really did have feelings he would be feeling the love. This is not a new Woody, it's 15+ years old, it was AJ's when he was little. Sean loves him even though his "sting is boken and Daddy can't fix it." (Note: the faded blue blanket)

4 comments:

Jaclyn said...

Happy Birthday Sean! Well done on picking one of the best familes ever to join. Everyone should be so fortunate as to have so many people love them. Well don Don and Carol, he is a cute little stink!

C. said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Oh wow, I totally cried on that one, thanks a lot Carol! I'm so happy Sean is where he belongs--its both a happy ending and a happy beginning. (And I think he looks a TON like Ryder in that first picture you posted!)

Jori said...

Thanks for sharing. Of course I am in tears! Happy BDAY to Sean!

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