It's pins and needles time

No I'm not nervous about how we are going to pay for our new front yard swimming pool! Sean and Ethan having a good time on Saturday.

My nerves really can't take the continued drama of Jenny and Ryan and custody. We are coming down to the wire and it's getting heated. Lanette called and told me that Ryan had told the girls therapist that after they get the girls back they are going to get Sean. Yikes if that didn't have me running for an ativan. Then yesterday Lanette told me the girls told her they had gone to a blue house with their mommy and they were going to live there with their mom, dad and Grandpa and they had their own room and so did Sean. Just hearing them mention Sean makes my heart pound, my stomach hurt and gives me a full blown anxiety attack.

Here's the update on the week. Catherine (my niece) put a serious bug in the guardian ad litem's ear and now the GAL is on fire and fighting for the girls. At the team meeting last week (I didn't go, couldn't take it). They cancelled Ryan's unsupervised visits because he had his dad at visits with the girls as witnessed by Lanette. Brie told Lanette that her grandpa had a big gun and a knife and was going to kill her (Lanette). Touching words from a 4-year-old to be sure. Jenny told the team that she had found a 24 hour day care next to her work. (Lie it closes at 6 pm). They cancelled the trial home placement that was supposed to start this week and Lanette has taken the girls to Lake Powell. There is a hearing scheduled for July 25th before a judge to see if they have cause to stop Ryan's visits. The GAL is then putting together and evidence hearing for August 17 when the girls are supposed to be sent home with their mom. There are no extensions after the 17th. Either they go home or rights are terminated. I'm sure there is an appeal process for Jenny and Ryan but there would be no reunification on the part of the state and visits would stop. The GAL has subpoenaed Jenny and Ryan's phone records. They have a picture off their face book where Kylie is sitting on Ryan's dad's lap during one of Jenny's visits. The girls are not allowed to be around Ryan's dad. I don't know what is going to happen and I am scared to even hope. The case worker is pessimistic and says it doesn't matter what the attorney's do the girls are going home with their mom. The GAL is more positive that she is going to get rights terminate. Jenny is still lying constantly. Ryan's attorney is a pit bull. How she can sleep at night fighing to send those girls back to the hell hole they came from is beyond me. I suppose it's her job.

Jenny called me in a tizzy on Thursday because she had the girls and had to meet with her parole officer. I drove to her house picked her up and took the girls and Sean for ice cream while she had her visit. On her way there she kept saying that she had anxiety and hadn't slept the night before. When I picked her up she said it went well and she had a new parole office but kept her hands in her head and said she had a pounding headache and was stressed. It takes a lot to stress Jenny she usually just lies.

A funny note: While I had the kids at Sonic Brie said "Gama can priguns fry?" I said "what". She repeated "can priguns fry?" I looked at her and there was a pigeon standing at her feet. "Yes Brie, pigeons can fly." I told Lanette and she said the speech therapist said Brie's problem is just lack of stimulation in her early years and that it will continue to improve with stimulation. (That of course is not the funny part).

The hearing on the 17th should be a doozy, with phone records, Lanette's statement, the therapist testimony, face book pictures and I am guessing they will subpoena Alika about seeing them in the bar. I said to Jenny "why didn't you tell me you saw Alika in a bar?" and she said "I did." I said "you did not" and she said well I asked you how old Alika was and I told you I picked a friend up from a bar. Right Jenny that's just like telling me you were in  a bar with Ryan drinking and ran into Alika TWICE!

 I am praying that the judge will protect the girls and do the right thing for them by allowing them to be raised in a loving, stable home.  If the judge sends them home I will have to increase by Lexapro and will probably have a total break down. I can't imagine Sean going back to them. Sean hungry, scared, sleeping in filth.

Jenny wanted Sean overnight this week and I told her no but that Don would drop Sean off for they day on his way to work and pick him up on his way home. When Don told Sean where they were going Sean looked at Don and said "Daddy please don't leave me there."  Just typing that makes me cry. Please God don't make us leave him there. It's not fair to Sean and I couldn't stand for him to have to grow up in an abusive, neglectful home. He is such a great little boy and we love him so much. He did have a fun day with his sisters and was happy when Don picked him up. I'm OK with play dates but please no over night visits.