The drama of my baby mama

It has been a stressful week of dealing with Jenny. She got it in her head that we should “let” her take Sean unattended for long periods of times because that is how the original court order reads, “visits will be as agreed on by both parties and may include overnight.” I tried to play nice and stall her hoping she would let it go. But Jenny is like a dog with a bone when she sets her mind to something or when she’s looking for something to control. I had a semi nice conversation with her and explained that I understand she feels powerless and her life is out of control but….. That got me no where. She started sending text message that I perceived as nasty. “I want Sean! He is my son and you have to give him to me…..” This was causing me huge anxiety. Don kept saying chill, she can’t take him. Catherine and Kyle kept saying chill. If she wants him let her call the police and try to take him and then we will file a court order. I have tried so hard to remain calm with Jenny and not lose it and go off on her! I just don’t want the conflict.

It came to a head yesterday. She said she had talked to “her attorney” (state appointed to represent her in the states case against her in regards to the girls) and “her attorney” said the state didn’t have anything to do with Sean. I told her “my attorney” (family appointed) said not to let her have him attended. This went back and forth via phone tag and text messages. My anxiety was rising. I had told her I would take her and Sean to see Toy Story today and she was excited about that but it didn’t distract her she kept asking and asking when I was going to let her take Sean. Finally last night at ten I had enough. I spent the 30 minute drive home from work going over and over in my head what I was gong to say to her. I called her and woke her up. I told her I didn’t want a screaming match at the Gateway today and wanted to get this conflict out of the way before we were with Sean. She said ok. I told her (again) that the only reason Sean wasn’t in foster care was because we had custody and there was no logic to leaving a child in our custody with people who had their children removed by the state and bottom line. WE AREN’T GOING TO ALLOW THAT. I was going to tell her that she could agree or disagree and if she disagreed I would have a court order filed ASAP and a judge would decide but before I could get to that or even raise my voice she backed down and started to cry. (I was relieved. I really didn’t want to fight.) She said she lost the girls and she felt like since Sean wasn’t in state custody she could still control him and wanted to “cling” to him etc. I told her while I can sympathize with her emotions she still can’t have him unattended. She said she understood.


Hopefully, that’s the end of that silliness because it is really getting on my nerves! I’m worrying if she is going to break into my house at night and kidnap Sean. That would of course take transportation. I’ve pictured the “Amber Alert.” Missing two year old probably on public transportation. Then again Elizabeth Smart was on public transportation so it’s still a scary thought. Then there are those two four year olds in the valley that have been murdered by their parents recently. Sean is a pretty demanding, indulged two year old and I can easily see him pitching continuous fits if he was with Jenny or someone else and them losing it and hurting him. I just can’t even deal with thinking about that. In the end I listened to her cry for 30 minutes about how out of control her life is. Yes her life sucks but I have tried to help her take control of her life to no avail and now there is nothing I can or will do to help her fix it. My interest was always in keeping her kids safe. Initially, my goal was to help her keep her kids safe but I failed with that plan. However, I did succeed in that the kids are safe. I do have a certain amount of sadness for her but then I have increasing frustration. She still lies to about everything. I also couldn’t help but think another shoe is about to drop on her head and she doesn’t even know it and it’s a dang big shoe! I got a call from the WFS welfare fraud investigator. He had investigated her a year and a half ago. He said he sat outside her house trying to determine if Ryan lived there and she was really nasty and lied to him. I don’t know the details but in the end they settled a fraud case and Jenny and Ryan were supposed to pay back the money they stole. They never did. They are now launching a new fraud case and it looks like a lot of fraud. They have been claiming Sean for food stamps and day care all the time we’ve had custody. They say that they are not married and deny that they have ever lived together. If the fraud is over $5000 they will face criminal charges. It has to be over that because they have been getting $895 a month for the last year for child care when the kids haven’t been in child care. Because it is a second offense it could have more severe consequences. Not that I have been impressed with the states consequences. They committed fraud before and the state rewarded them by giving them more money. This month even after Sabrina called the state and said she had the kids they sent the food stamps and daycare money to Jenny and Ryan. It’s insanity. The investigator said he will not stop until justice is served. We will see. The rain of bad karma for all the crap that they have pulled over the past five years is falling on their heads and more storm clouds are brewing. I just want Sean and the girls to be safe and happy.